Day 71 to 73 - The YouTube Doctor

21 - 23 February 2022

Apologies to my three readers for the delay in updates. To be honest, nothing much has happened over the last few days and I did not want to bore you. It seems in the days when you think nothing has happened, much has.

“After you find out all the things that can go wrong, your life becomes less about living and more about waiting.” ― Chuck Palahniuk

The five days of injections are over. As a newly accredited YouTube doctor, I feel entirely confident offering the following advice regarding the administering injections - 

What you need - 

YouTube

Difficult to open glass liquid capsules

Powder filled mini bottles

Courage

Syringes with the largest needles you can imagine

Alcohol wipes

Bandaids

Two bottles of wine

Procedure - 

Watch YouTube. How to break the glass capsules. How to mix the serum. How to open the syringe. How to draw the medication. Where to use the alcohol wipes (everywhere). Where to administer the injection. Outer quadrant above the bum crack). How to administer.

Drink the wine. A bottle each. One for the injecter. One for the injictee. Without question the most important step. Helps with courage, a steady hand, and pain reduction.

Alcohol wipe everything. Three times.

Mix medication. The most difficult part will be cracking the glass capsule. Use wine if necessary.

Draw medication.

Summon courage.

Inject.

The last few days have been a blur of doctors, consulate visits, MRIs, ultrasounds, and X-rays. The end result is Shell needs surgery. This is happening next Wednesday. Our visa is extended.

After finding out it will be a week until surgery we have decided to spend a long weekend in Tuscany. When life hands you lemons and all that…

That is all.

Daily posts returning from tomorrow.